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A Compilation Of Works Featuring:
Scott Jackson & Kenneth Armstrong

"Skydrol Salute"

Contribution By: Scott Jackson
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One warm summer evening in the early Seventies found me kneeling beneath the Number Two engine of a DC-8-53. The airplane was well away from the floodlights of the CYVR terminal building and the complete darkness accorded by the midnight shift had me gripping my flashlight between my teeth as I used my 5/8” socket on a ratchet to unlock the two bottom cowl latches. Once they were unlocked, I set down the tool and used both hands to pull the doors together so that the latches could spring open, then I leaned back to allow the doors to drop open.

In the beam of the flashlight, there was a brief flash as something fell out of the cowling, right down inside the front of my coveralls. That surprised me, as this JT3D-3B isn’t like a hard-working, multi-row radial engine, from the cowlings of which we expect a mini-tsunami of black lubricating oil conveying a few bits and pieces that the engine has shaken off. But what really surprised me was that whatever had fallen into my coveralls was continuing to move around and-at six-foot-two plus and less-than one hundred and eighty pounds and wearing only a T-shirt and shorts underneath my coveralls, there was lots of room for it to move around.

I shouted in alarm ( okay, full disclosure: I screamed like a teenage girl) and jumped up, banging my head on either the fuel-control unit or turbine starter on the bottom of the engine which drove me back to my knees. Eventually standing upright, I proceeded to set a record for a strip-tease, much to the wonder and amusement of my colleagues who came running from around the jet.

Finally disrobing enough to kick off the coveralls and standing there in my underwear and work boots, we collectively shone our flashlights on the rumpled clothing and poked at it until something crawled out. My much-older and worldly colleagues recognized it immediately as a cockroach and I will sanitize their limited-adjective comments to just say that it was the biggest that any of them had ever seen. It looked about four inches long, not counting the antennae. It tried to scurry away into the darkness but we could hold it hostage by confusing it with the multiple, crossed beams of our flashlights.

The consensus of my learned colleagues was that we could not allow such a formidable insect to populate British Columbia so we had better dispose of it right away.

Someone brought some turbine-engine oil from the servicing van and poured a bit on it but it didn’t even slow down, circling ominously with antennae waving. Then someone tried some jet fuel but this too had no noticeable effect. Next up was a few drops of Skydrol and that did the trick. It took only a few moments for it to arch its back, rise up on its hideous legs and expire.

Later that morning, making the entries to return the jet to service as the Sun lightened the sky behind Mount Baker,  I looked back in the journey log to discover that it had been through Jamaica a couple of days before, that thing must have been  riding around in the cowling ever since.
So what, exactly, is this miracle fluid that works so well as a pest remover?

As airliners got larger and heavier, their flight-control surfaces and landing gear and flaps got larger and heavier too. To move these required either control tabs for the surfaces and/or more powerful hydraulic systems. More power comes from either larger actuators or higher system pressures and for weight reasons, engineers went with the latter. The tiniest pinhole leak in a system pressurized at three-thousand psi emits hydraulic fluid in a perfectly-atomized spray, onto hot engine components, pneumatic ducting and wheel brakes, just like the fuel nozzles in the combustion chambers and with identical results.

This required a search for a hydraulic fluid that wasn’t as flammable as the red-tinted, petroleum-based fluid used at the time and eventually Skydrol was created. Wikipedia describes it as a phosphate-ester base fluid, naturally clear but dyed purple. One thing it is also very-good at is dissolving the soles of shoes. When I started in Line Maintenance, I wore the boots that the RCAF had issued to me but it only took a few days to notice that I was leaving visible footprints on the concrete floor of the hangar and also that I was starting to walk like the bad guy in Terminator, with my shoes sticking to the floor and requiring increasing effort to break them free. There was no visible puddles or slicks and the floor was daily cleaned by one of those ride-on cleaners like the ones used in shoppings malls, so this stuff must be tenacious. Air Canada had a purchase agreement with a company that provided shoes with Skydrol-resistant soles. I have no idea what they were made of but the soles were an almost-transparent yellow/orange colour and stood up well and I bought a pair with my first paycheque.

Curious, I read the printing on a can of Skydrol and noted that it “causes extreme pain to eye tissue but no lasting damage” or words to that effect. This was confirmed by the occasional shout from a mechanic who would be standing with eyes squeezed shut and arms outstretched and all those nearby would drop their tools and rush to his aid, to lead him to one of several eyewash stations located along the hangar sidewalls. Not being a complete idiot, I promptly wore goggles whenever working around or under any part of the hydraulic system. 
Did I mention that this stuff is tenacious? My time would come.

It happened about 0500 one morning a couple of years later, bleeding  new wheelbrakes I had installed on a DC-8. Despite wearing long sleeves, rubber gloves, googles, with the auxiliary hydraulic pump screaming away in the wheelwell above my head and with the connection between the brake housing bleeder screw and the discharge hose firmly wrapped in cloth rags, somehow an invisible drop or mist found its way to my eyes and I can confirm that the pain is indeed intense. So I shouted for help with my eyes uncontrollably squeezed firmly shut and soon felt guiding hands leading me to an eyewash basin. Despite my eyes looking extremely hungover for the rest of the shift and crying tears for awhile, there was no permanent damage.

My last experience with this evil fluid happened many years later, when I was a First Officer on a TriStar. We had cranked up when the sharp-eyed Second Officer noticed one of the hydraulic reservoir quantity indicators went to empty in a hurry. We shut down and called Maintenance. After a while, the Captain went outside to see what was happening.  The Second Officer and I sat in the flight deck waiting for the Captain to return. And we waited. And waited. 

The Captain never did return. I unstrapped and went outside to find out from Maintenance that the Captain had walked under the tail of the fuselage and looked up to be rewarded with a single drop of Skydrol to the eye. I hoped that he immediately adopted the “Skydrol Salute,” eyes shut and arms outstretched, like a statue on a mountaintop in Rio de Janeiro, waiting to be led away. We packed up his kit and shared the extra load on the hike back to Operations.

Skydrol or a similar fluid is used in most hydraulic systems that operate above about fifteen-hundred psi and some of the latest systems operate at five-thousand psi as seal design and quality improves to meet the demands so the dangers, however temporary, are always  only one drop or an inadvertent encounter with the invisible mist away.
Let’s be careful out there...

"Adult Flight Deck Camera"

Contribution By: Scott Jackson
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Flying more frequently with Yvonne has made me think of her as an In-Charge on the 787 and it brought back a funny memory:

The 777 was the first airliner I flew that had cameras in the ceiling of the forward galley and one monitoring the flight deck door by looking back along the port aisle into the first-Class cabin. We could select which view to watch on our EFB screens including looking at all of them at once. Usually, I chose a resting view of the cockpit door as the security protocol was for them to phone us first then come to door, input the access code then stand back and look up at the camera before we would unlock the door.

This one evening after Sunset, while cruising along, I noticed on my EFB screen someone come through the privacy curtain from first class into the galley area by the forward boarding door. The In Charge was sitting in her jumpseat right by the door. This person started talking to The I/C and I recognized her as a particularly-well endowed and attractive brunette flight attendant although not in uniform so obviously either deadheading or on personal travel. After a couple of moments, for whatever reason, the I/C pointed over her shoulder, up at the ceiling camera.

The brunette looked up at the camera( it felt like she was looking directly at me), stuck out her tongue while pulling up her top and flashing me! I gasped and choked, momentarily speechless, jerking like I’d received an electric shock and my F/O thought I was having a cardiac event. I couldn’t let this pass. I grabbed up the handset from the back of the pedestal and dialled the I/C’s seat. I watched her turn and pickup the handset and said, “ The next time she plans to do that, tell her to give the Captain some warning first, I damned near had a heart attack!” She hung up and I watched her speak to the brunette who’s eyes widened, she looked up at the camera( at me) then spun around and disappeared past the curtain so fast that the slow-frame rate and black-and-White video made her look she had evaporated into thin air, leaving only a curtain swept into the cabin.

​I made sure I was saying goodbye to all three hundred plus passengers as they deplaned, just so that I could see her expression. Well, the joke was on me. Instead of looking sheepish or embarrassed, she didn’t say a word but her body language said that was a freebie, just for me. Some girls, you just don’t want to mess with...

"The Perfect Flight, Are You Up To It?"
Contribution By: Kenneth Armstrong
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For that matter, is the perfect flight achievable?  Theoretically, not only is it possible, it may even be attainable for pilots each and every time they work towards this goal.  For that matter, it should be every pilot’s ambition to strive for this target because it would maximize safety margins, passenger comfort and optimize flying efficiency.  After all, don’t we all want to be at least very good aviators and possess the satisfaction that we make the world a better place? 

 How does this endeavor begin?  The answer is a variable; however, it can start with ensuring you are personally current in all aspects for the upcoming flight – and the potential surprises that go beyond the scheduled activities.  This might include a recent review of emergency procedures, learning in advance of our passengers needs and preferences (to enhance flight planning) and checking the weather and NOTAMS.  The later are frequently overlooked by pilots and their omission can cause a world of grief by leading to an accident/incident/violation and the aftermath from these errors.
 
 Additional pre-flight planning should include reviewing the aircraft’s airworthiness, minor discrepancies and how they might affect the flight and mitigation of risks.  Pilots should confirm the mandatory licensing documents are valid and in place.  Is there an intercept procedures card aboard and is the magnetic compass correction card current?   Do you accomplish a full walk around inspection (pre-flight inspection) according to the POH checklist?  Gotcha.  It’s rare to see a pilot complete all of the pre-flight and pre-take off requirements and yet any one of the missed items can be a causal factor in an accident. The preflight inspection is one of the best forms of insurance for a safe flight – and, there is no financial premium to pay…..

If your priorities are correct, you place the interests of your passengers first, and your own needs last.  So, have you provided the detailed (and obligatory) passenger safety briefing to ensure your passengers will be comfortable and safe?  This service continues after take off with updates on progress and destination conditions (where applicable) and ensuring cabin temperature and ventilation are set for occupant comfort.  Some pilots seem to fear radio use and avoid tasks such as position reports, traffic updates and calls to flight service for weather or traffic information.  There are many benefits to position reports on a flight plan.  Not only do you advise other traffic in your area of your position, but the recorded message will help during a search if you become overdue.  As an ex SAR pilot, I can tell you that knowing locations you have passed on a flight will help narrow the search area and rescue will be much faster.

During the course of the flight a pilot’s goal should be to maximize safety margins.  This might include cruising several thousand feet AGL rather than just clearing the tree tops and overcoming the desire to carve a course along a river between the trees and risking losing your head in the wire environment.  Commonly, during soaring flights at altitude I see planes low flying and wonder if they have ever considered that a minute of carb icing or box canyon will modify their life span….  Enroute, the pilot workload is typically reduced; however, this can be an appropriate time to scan for suitable emergency spots in case the engine or propeller fail. If available, you might want to contact Air Traffic Services for flight following.  On cross country flights, I almost always use this service.  Many of the times radar services advise of traffic squawking a similar altitude and location, I often do not see the traffic even though it is nearby. On other occasions, a change in course is necessary.  Having had several near misses over the decades, when these services were not available has made me a believer in using ATS.  Sometimes they are too busy to provide information to VFR traffic and sometimes their workload does not advise a pilot of possible conflicts, so, it is important to maintain a good lookout at all times.  

 Monitoring temperatures and pressures and other engine parameters can be very helpful for several reasons.  When you commonly fly the same aircraft, and you record instrument settings it is often possible for forecast issues before they become emergencies.  This recording of data helped save my bacon during a flight in a twin turbine aircraft and I diverted to the closest bush landing strip in time to make an emergency landing and abandon the aircraft with smoke pouring upwards! 

The perfect flight doesn’t end when we help our passengers out of the aircraft with their baggage etc.  We owe it to our flight partners, the AME’s, to provide inputs on the plane’s condition when applicable.  Therefore, it is also helpful to do a post flight walk around inspection as it is possible to detect a developing issue that can be solved.  This is better than arriving and discovering a problem during your next pre-flight and having to cancel the trip.  For the perfection oriented pilot, one’s vocabulary should not utilize the phrase: “That’s not my job.” Your AME and yourself are a team and the perfect pilot includes that technician whenever necessary.

The scope of this column doesn’t allow all topics to be covered and since I am only an aspiring/wannabe perfect pilot, some important items likely have been overlooked.  My goal was to touch on topics commonly overlooked.  BCAC welcomes readers to provide their important inputs in the goal to seeking flying perfection.

(Published to BCGA July 16, 2020)

"Buying A Plane, What You Really Need To Know"
Contribution by: Kenneth Armstrong
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​  Every time a personal aircraft graces my life, I wonder how it was possible to survive a few years without one.  However, the wise purchase of an aircraft is fraught with challenges that often overwhelm a purchaser before or after filling his name into the slots in the Certificate of Registration.
 
For instance, Buyer A bought a fixed gear, fixed pitch airplane that received an inexpensive pre-purchase inspection by a recognized aviation mechanic. Months later his regular Aircraft Maintenance Engineer (AME) conducted a hundred hour inspection and determined that the owner would have to double his investment in the plane to accomplish necessary repairs and compliance with missed Airworthiness Directives (AD’s).
 
Buyer B was elated to step up from a basic trainer into a high performance retractable with a laminar flow wing that nearly doubled his cruise speeds.  He was a conservative flyer and chose not to pay for “hull” insurance and therefore did not require any training to meet an underwriter’s requirements.  In hindsight, type training would have been a good investment.  Unfortunately, he never learned this as he was killed in a low altitude stall/spin accident during his “self-checkout” in the circuit.
 
Buyer C sold his airplane six months after purchase when the operating costs and maintenance forced him to place a second mortgage on the house.  Well, the full truth is the mortgage was necessary as his wife filed for divorce because the pilot wasn’t around much anymore….
 
What’s the common thread between these aircraft purchasers?  In each case, the pilots rushed into an aircraft purchase without fully considering all aspects of the transaction and the consequences of aircraft ownership.  In this series, we will lead prospective purchasers (and sellers) through the many steps associated with aircraft transactions.
 
Selecting The “Right” Types
 
During my tenure selling 70 aircraft as a Cessna Sales Manager and Chief Pilot in Calgary, one of my challenges included educating prospective purchasers on suitable aircraft for their needs.  It wasn’t unusual to have a wealthy farmer (not many left now if you believe the news) sitting in my office with plans to buy a new turbo 210 Centurion with the intent of flying off his farm fields to visit other local farmers for coffee. This purchase would require a contract with a live-in maintenance engineer to keep the landing gear serviceable! After discussions, they chose a fixed gear Cessna 206 instead.
 
A hefty family of four would show up to buy a Cessna 172 Skyhawk for lengthy cross countries.  They would find happiness in a Cessna 182 Skylane with its true four-place and full fuel capability.  More often than not, it was necessary to convince low time pilots that they should build flight time and skills before taking on a hairy chested retractable.  Sometimes it was necessary to be “hard core” and point out they would not be able to obtain insurance coverage on their dream machine until sufficient experience levels were achieved.  Other than a bouncing cheque, there is nothing so discouraging to a salesman than turning a pilot loose in an aircraft designed to increase his self esteem but more likely to scare the living daylights out of him.
 
Assessing Needs Vs. Desires
Desires.  Now, there is a concept that can get us in trouble.  The aircraft we might covet for “show and tell” during airport coffee shop chats and the machine that will serve our needs are often very different.  Most of us fly for pleasure and occasional business use.  If flying is fun, why would we want to rush to a destination?  Surely the slower aircraft provides us more time to enjoy the scenery, is generally easier to fly and more forgiving.  Moreover, it is likely much cheaper to operate and maintain as well.  Besides, operating a complex aircraft we truly can’t afford that may be unserviceable much of the time, or one that scares us every time we are on final approach is not “fun.”  Would you want to pay for that experience?
 
Our Basic Needs
When considering an aircraft purchase, we need to assess the mission requirements.  An aircraft is essentially a good compromise when it will accomplish 90% or more of our typical mission needs.  To buy twice as much aircraft to cover that occasional 10% assignment is not only inefficient but also wasteful of money and precious fuel.  Flying around with most of the seats empty is beneficial to no one. 
 
For the occasional flights that require more capacity or speed, you can potentially rent an aircraft. The Cessna Transportation Analysis Course taught purchasers to consider many factors.  These include payload with full and partial fuel tanks, effective range with varying payloads, airport/airstrip performance and the efficiency of flying at lower speeds than airliners but landing at small airports nearer to destinations.  In a desire to serve customers’ requirements, sales personnel were also taught intricacies of financing, insurance and the true costs of operation.  Many of these were “eye openers.”  Moreover, each of these considerations had the capability of inflating the price of ownership beyond the means of many purchasers.  We will consider these individually, so you won’t be surprised and overcome by aircraft costs.
 
Your complete honesty with yourself is of paramount importance as you have to consider yearly utilization, marital considerations, effects of inclement weather on your potential planning and your piloting skills.
 
Once the field is narrowed, you can conduct really detailed research by contacting type clubs (such as the Cessna Cardinal Club) to obtain nitty gritty details and excellent advice from knowledgeable individuals.  Transport Canada and the FAA also compile a great deal of information on Airworthiness Directives.  Individual aircraft manufacturers also provide mandatory and recommended changes for their aircraft.
 
What’s with New Aircraft Pricing?
 Ever wonder why new aircraft are ten times more expensive than they were 30 years ago?  Many factors are at work.  Similar to our incomes, the wages of aircraft factory employees’ have increased tenfold.  Additionally, avionics and instrumentation are far more advanced and constitute a higher percentage of the plane’s price.  Essentially, the prices haven’t increased, they have simply kept pace with inflation - just like other commodities.  Remember, the five cent Coke is more than a dollar, so the aircraft is a bargain….! 
 
            
Are Used Aircraft Good Values?
 One of the benefits of used aircraft purchases is they become an investment against inflation.  Typically, most attractive planes actually go up in value as their new versions are introduced such that owners almost always sell their aircraft for more than they paid. Realistically, a purchaser should be aware that the same money invested wisely in bonds or stocks would likely provide at least the same return over time.  So, any differential between investment returns and aircraft value should be considered a cost of ownership.  For instance, the new Cessna 172 Linda and I bought in 1975 cost a less than $20,000.  We recently saw that plane (C-GKLA) in Ottawa in like-new condition with a market value in excess of $80,000.  So, would that have been a good investment?  Yes and No!  Compared to a car it looks exceptional; however, one must be aware of the constantly slipping purchasing power of our dollar and the affect that has on prices.  In effect, selling the aircraft today would yield approximately $25,000 of the 1975 dollars.  While this makes the aircraft a proven investment, the actual yield is only .7% a year average.  Come to think of it, that’s not far off current savings interest rates – but much less than the intervening years.
            
To conclude, don’t expect your aircraft to be a great investment – but, if you care for it, it will likely hold its value.
            
In terms of values, a true creampuff is an excellent investment.  You will pay more, but the lower maintenance costs and higher resale value will pay you back – with interest.  Buying a “beater” to save money is a false investment as all the rattles, component overhauls, sanding, painting and other efforts will often add up to far more than the aircraft’s market value and you will lose money rather than break even – or profit.  Been there done that with a doggy Stinson that depleted our bank account!   We made the mistake in the early eighties of trusting the owner’s mechanic who had just placed a fresh annual C of A on the aircraft…. see below for pre-purchase inspection tips.  
 
Unless buying a basket case is a labor of love for you and you don’t value your time at any more than a dollar and hour, avoid poorly maintained aircraft.
 
If you have ever wondered why some folks would pay so much for a new aircraft and its attendant warranty, the answer is they have likely owned a used aircraft that cost them more….!
 
How to Determine Value
 This is a major challenge.  You can spend a lot of time in the market-place learning prices/values – however, a fairly easy alternative is the aircraft blue book.  There are a number of wholesale/retail aircraft price books available.  Generally, they are fairly accurate – but prices can fluctuate quickly due to market conditions.  Users of the guides should realize prices are based on aircraft with mid-time engines, “average avionics” and standard equipment.  Variations on these themes will affect the pricing.  
 
Value is also in the eye of the beholder.  If you want to buy a Cessna 172 or 182, you will likely pay a premium because they are in demand due to their perceived value.  Conversely, a Lark Commander, which performs similarly to a 172 will be far less money.  A good value?  It will likely save you money – but don’t forget you will be selling it back into that same marketplace some day.  Who knows, perhaps you will be lucky as they may be considered a collectors’ item in ten years….?  Generally, you pay going into the plane or coming out – unless you are very shrewd and can anticipate market changes.
 
Will That be Cash or Credit?
If your aircraft will be financed, you must also consider not only the interest charges (which will be considerably higher than a new car purchase) but also the premiums one must pay to cover the mandatory insurance coverage the financing company will insist on.  If you are a low time pilot with little experience on the aircraft you are planning to buy, the insurance rates will be high.   Coverage may not even be available at any cost!  While there are many insurance brokers, there are actually very few underwriters.  If you are refused coverage by one, it’s quite possible the others will feel the same way.  Know before you buy!
 
Aviation liability insurance to protect others against your piloting is mandatory in Canada - other coverage is not.  The yearly premium to cover three passenger seats as well as property damage, legal liability and bodily injury would be approximately $1000 (for $500,000 to $1 million of insurance coverage).  In Canada, the minimum recommended insurance coverage is $1 million while $3 million or more is suggested for the USA based on average court settlements.  Additionally, it will cost 1-2% of your aircraft’s value for ground only (not in motion) coverage. 
 
Thinking of full coverage?  Depending on your total time, aircraft type, accident/violations history and time on type, full hull coverage for flight might run 2-8% typically with much higher premiums possible after insurance companies scramble to make up for their pandemic virus losses.  Protect yourself, consider these costs in your financial projections and obtain quotes - before committing to a purchase!
 
You Are a Member of The Elite
 When you buy an aircraft others will look up to you as a wealthy, knowledgeable person – or a nut.  You will also feel on top of the world knowing you have the ultimate in get anywhere fast transportation.   That is until you start paying the big bucks for tie downs or hangarage, gas at approximately two dollars a liter and fuel flows that make you think someone must be siphoning your gas at night.  Our aircraft maintenance engineers are an honest, hard working lot; however, aircraft can be time intensive when it comes to maintenance and you may be surprised what mandatory Airworthiness Directives and unscheduled repairs can add to your operating costs.  The message here is to budget for additional, unplanned expenditures – so you don’t lose your plane to the finance company when the unexpected arises.
 
Ready, Set, Go
 Now that you are prepared for the responsibilities of ownership and hopefully have an understanding spouse, it’s time to look for an aircraft.  You already know the few types that are suitable for your needs and it’s time to start a search on airport bulletin boards, magazine, internet and brokerages.  I won’t begin to tell you what magazines you should read nor how to use a search engine to look for words such as: “aircraft, plane, sell, buy,” however, one web site with a lot of activity is barnstormers.com  If you use the services of a broker there are a few clues worthy of consideration.  Likely he/she will be located at the local airport(s) and they will have listings, magazines and perhaps poster boards full of aircraft.
 
The salesperson will need to know your purchase price range, method of payment, perhaps flying experience and the aircraft types you are considering.  He may also suggest a few types you haven’t considered – but be sure the goal isn’t simply to unload something that has been hogging his ramp for a long time.  Stick to your guns, you know your needs.  If you find a truly dependable, honest broker you can enter into a contract whereby they will search for, inspect and acquire the aircraft for you for a percentage of the aircraft value.  Unless you really trust the broker, you should carry the responsibility for the transaction yourself – so loose ends don’t wrap around your neck and choke you!
 
Buying in the USA?
 I prefer Canadian purchases as it eliminates a lot of the paperwork and hassles associated with American aircraft importation.  TCA can become amazingly fernickity over import paperwork and aircraft can be rejected for seemingly minor reasons – beware!  Besides, buying Canadian provides more recourse – legally speaking.  If you want to buy from the States, consider using a professional broker and AME services that understand importing procedures to help overcome the hurdles as importation is an art best handled by the knowledgeable.
 
If you have an American A&P do the initial inspection, they should look under “Maintenance and Manufacturing” for MSI 26 (Maintenance Service Instruction on Imported Aircraft 26).  After all, these are the guidelines that must be met in Canada.  While most writers try to avoid this statement, it is generally true that Canadian standards of airworthiness are higher-such that an aircraft that is OK in the USA can often be rejected in Canada.  Hopefully, forewarned is forearmed.
 
Potential Purchases
 When you have found a potential aircraft, don’t be hasty…your work has only started.  Aircraft systems and the required paperwork are far more complex than cars and any rushing to complete the purchase can cost you big-time in the future.  If the paperwork is not correct, you will be forced to hire someone to accomplish the mechanical and/or paper trail tasks that will allow the aircraft to be perceived as airworthy by Transport Canada Aviation (TCA).
 
If you have a good knowledge of current pricing thanks to your research, you could enter into a conditional contract with the seller that would secure the aircraft for you and remove it from the marketplace for a short period while it undergoes inspections.
 
Your interim purchase agreement should include considerations such as: “today’s” date, deposit amount and refund ability conditions, full purchase price (subject to change if the inspection discovers unserviceabilities), buyer and seller names and addresses, impartial witness signature, registration and serial number, aircraft type, date offer expires and any special responsibilities that might be agreed to.
 
After more than a hundred aircraft transactions I can assert that less than ten percent of the aircraft one encounters are truly in excellent condition.  Many of those apparent “cream puffs” turn out to have snag sheets as long as your arm.  The pre-purchase inspection is almost always the most important aspect – or the best insurance you can buy – to ensure the aircraft’s true condition.
 
Unless an owner is trying to hide defects, he should readily agree to an inspection as it will uncover potential problems for himself (if he ends up keeping the aircraft) – and after all, you are paying for the inspection.
 
You should hire an AME who is familiar with the type to inspect the aircraft (but not the aircraft owner’s AME as he is likely biased towards the owner and his own work accomplished to date…).   It’s Ok, and even wise, to discuss the plane’s history and work record with the aircraft’s long term AME – but another opinion is necessary – just like a second opinion in medicine.
 
A cursory glance is not adequate as a flashy exterior can hide interior corrosion or expensive AD’s that have not been complied with. Similarly an engine that almost sparkles could have significant corrosion or wear within.  If the airplane lives in smoggy and or humid area and has not had a recent engine overhaul it might be wise to pull two cylinders to inspect the camshaft and other areas.  While this may cost upwards of $1000 for a detailed inspection, it will provide peace of mind while you are flying your new aircraft over mountainous terrain or open expanses of water.  If significant wear or damage is found on the aircraft, you can bargain the price downwards or reject the aircraft.  Be sure the AME accomplishes a thorough inspection of the logs and applicable airworthiness directives.  On a recent sale, it was found the engine data plate was missing and the installed magnetos were not approved for that engine.  Obviously, the aircraft was flying well; however, the resulting paperwork proved time consuming and costly – for the seller – as we caught the discrepancies during the inspection!
 
Who really owns the aircraft?  This can be a question that leads to potential pitfalls as some machines are owned by companies and not the individual and may require additional signatures.  Canada, unlike the USA, does not have a central registry for aircraft ownership. This makes purchases a “crap shoot.”  Just because Transport registry files show an individual owns an aircraft, it may turn out it was sold months ago.  Conversely, it may have several mechanics’ liens against it.  In Canada, the only way to cover yourself is to have a clause in the Bill of Sale that the seller signs that the aircraft is free of liens and encumbrances.  While it may be a false statement, it does give you ammunition in court….
 
On the topic of liens, some provinces can, for a fee, provide information on mechanics and other liens against the owner.  Check locally to find out.
 
“Test Pilots” Required
 An essential aspect of the pre-purchase is a full spectrum flight test.  Although this is another topic worthy of its own article, we will touch on the highlights.  Depending on the aircraft’s number of seats, you may have to conduct the flight solo – if the owner will permit.  Otherwise you may have to find someone mutually acceptable to both parties to conduct an impartial test.  Be sure to check that all mandatory paperwork is in the aircraft and up to date so you will not be conducting a flight illegally.
 
With more than one seat, it’s wise to carry someone who is most familiar with and can judge the aircraft type’s normal handling qualities - and to maximize safety.  It may turn out that the owner insists on flying in a two place with you to protect his investment and that’s OK too.  In an aircraft with three or more seats, the owner may wish to accompany you and your evaluation pilot. This is good as the vendor will be aware of any faults found with his aircraft and this provides a bargaining tool.
 
Essentially it is most desirable to fly at or near gross weight to ensure the aircraft meets standard performance for the type.  Confirm with the owner that there is insurance in place to cover any potential liability claims that might ensue after an accident/incident and determine responsibility in the event of a worse case scenario.  You should see the actual insurance paperwork as it is not uncommon for owners to let coverage lapse to save costs when they are going to sell their plane.
 
The flight test can reveal many discrepancies that might not be determined on the ground.  A few would include an improperly balanced propeller that creates vibration, and engine not putting out rated power, a transponder which is not working correctly, an out of rig aircraft, intermittent radios, exhaust fumes or heat/air leaks into the cockpit,  main wheel misalignment – to name a few. (For that matter I have commonly seen all of the above during evaluation flights – sometimes all on one aircraft.)
 
It’s wise to carry a list of all the items you wish to assess.  If the aircraft stalls too high or cruises too low, it could be the airspeed indicator, propeller pitch, or a twisted wing or sick engine.  Any variances from the norm for the type should be investigated by the AME.
 
Be sure to check all avionics.  With the communications radios, test the signal strength and clarity with a ground station a considerable distance away (40 miles or so – depending on your altitude) to ensure their output is “well tuned.” Confirm the transponder is working correctly by asking a radar equipped facility to check your signal is being received and to confirm the altitude read out.  Also, check navigation radios such as: VOR’s, ILS’s, RNAV’s, ADF’s, DME’s  and GPS receivers to ensure they are providing accurate readings.  This is quite important as they are all expensive to fix.
 
Also ensure that all engine and flight instruments are providing apparently accurate readings.  Any gauges that show readings near limits – such as oil temperature, CHT or oil pressure should be discussed with the AME who will conduct the inspection so he can expend effort to determine the causes.  Sometimes the causes are easily determined and fixed whereas they can also indicate serious engine wear or damage within.
 
Make sure you fly the aircraft during the flight evaluation to ensure it feels right to you.  If you are unfamiliar with the type, this can also provide lesson number one in familiarizing yourself with the plane and who better to help other than an expert pilot and/or the owner that is/are accompanying you?
 
Be sure to make up a checklist in advance of the flight of the items/systems you will be checking and note any discrepancies or relevant observations in the handling.
 
Ye Olde Bill of Sale
 TCA requires a proof of purchase to register your aircraft and it is wise to have a bill of sale signed in triplicate (TCA, seller, buyer copies) to aid the transfer.  The form should have the date, aircraft registration and serial number, amount of sale, deposit, names and signatures, (include a witness) addresses and any conditions relating to the purchase.
 
Conditions are designed to protect each side of the sale and might include numbered statements such as:
  1. The purchaser is responsible for any taxes or fees relating to the purchase.
  2. The seller warrants the aircraft is free of liens and encumbrances.
  3. The aircraft is sold on an “as is, where is” basis.
 
Bills of sale can include any conditions or terms that are mutually agreeable to each party and any terms agreed to should be included for the protection of each party.  On my most recent sale, the document had a statement that the vendor must produce a TCA accepted engine data plate within three months or the purchaser would acquire same and bill the vendor.  This apparently innocuous statement turned out to be very important as chasing a paperwork trail tends to be expensive.
 
You Aren’t Finished Yet
 After the search, inspection(s) and completion of Bill of Sale there is more paperwork.  Before letting the seller depart with your money, ensure they sign the copies of the registration forms so you can be processed by TCA as the new owner.   Send the C of R forms along with the application and the current fee to your local TCA office. You will retain the pink copy in the logs to allow you to fly for 60 days – until TCA gets the new C of R out to you – often late…. 
 
If you buy an aircraft from a dealer, you will be charged GST – thereby adding 7% to the purchase price.  Also, don’t be surprised when your aircraft is registered that TCA will advise your province and you will receive a bill from the finance minister looking for a piece of your pleasure.  Be sure to consider these possibilities in your purchase price.
 
If you want to fly your aircraft into the USA, you will need to pay for the aircraft radio license yearly.  Stay in Canada and it’s free as the Canadian Owners and Pilot Association has had the $45 yearly fee waived in our airspace.  Since you are considering aircraft ownership, I strongly suggest joining COPA for its many benefits.  
 
Of course, before you buy a plane you will have checked around to find the best AME, airport, tiedown, hangar and FBO in your area so your new bird has a home and support….
 
 
Insurance Considerations
 Don’t overlook insurance coverage or you may well pay a premium of a different sort.  Some underwriters who have been stung badly over recent events are strongly restricting coverage to various age groups and experience levels.  Your experience when compared to a given aircraft type’s characteristics might make you too much of a risk to obtain coverage.  However, don’t fret if you are a low timer who wants to buy a relatively high-performance aircraft, you might be able to secure coverage if you receive a number of hours of dual instruction on type.  This topic is so complex, the scope of this article cannot cover the intricacies. Suffice to say, shop around for coverage before you commit to an aircraft!  Public liability insurance is mandatory in Canada – but you do not have to insure your aircraft.  Previously, I have not covered my first 15 aircraft as this provides an intrinsic built-in safety factor as I am not tempted to push the weather or situation because I know any subsequent damage or wreckage is completely at my cost.
 
If you are prepared to accept the risk of loss on your own, you can save the yearly premium and in approximately 10-20 years pay for your aircraft!  The choice is yours.  On a personal note, my current plane has full hull coverage and in 20 years the premiums amount to 50% of the purchase price. I should add that my plane was purchased at a very good price and bad luck with vandalism and wind damage claims has amounted to the entire premiums.  So, essentially, I have broken even on costs and coverage.  I would consider myself very lucky if I did not consider my plane was out of service for two years while it was being repaired.
 
Operating Costs – Friend or Foe?
 Aircraft incur two types of expenses:  Fixed and Operating costs.  The Fixed aspects include purchase price, financing, hangarage or tie downs and insurance.  These can be calculated very readily on a yearly basis.  Generally, you have to pay them whether you fly the aircraft or not. Because of this, you will want to fly the plane as often as possible to “get your money’s worth.” To be succinct, in order to select ownership over renting, you will want to fly roughly 150 hours or more a year to obtain the intrinsic value associated with your own plane – because you will have all of the fixed costs whether you fly or not!
 
The direct Operating costs relate to actual flying and include fuel, oil, inspections, repairs and overhaul of time lifted components such as the engine and propeller.  These are self explanatory.  For a simple four place aircraft, owners can anticipate an approximate hourly cost of $60 per hour including a reserve towards overhaul.  What can’t be anticipated is overbudget items such as unplanned breakdowns.  Purchasers should allow some “sludge factor” in their budgetary planning so as not to be caught short financially.
 
Money spent on maintenance and aircraft improvements is an investment of sorts and contributes to the dependability and resale of the aircraft.  All to often, owners skimp in this area in an attempt to save money but end up selling themselves short when the aircraft is placed on the market and commands only a fraction of its original price.
 
Final Words of Advice
 Don’t be in a rush.  Far too many purchasers are afraid an aircraft will get away and fail to accomplish the due diligence that is mandatory for a successful purchase. Not only have I been there and done that, but I also bought the T-shirt – unfortunately, the fabric was rotten….
 
Don’t be afraid to turn to experts for opinions and advice on how to proceed.  There expertise will help remove the burden of not knowing what to do and make the trip to ownership a pleasant, fulfilling event.
 
Conduct in-depth research on the type(s) you are considering so you are aware of their strengths and their foibles.
 
Lastly be honest in the assessment of your piloting skills, your true aircraft needs and your ability to support the machine financially.
 
And post lastly, have a great time and fly conservatively as the experience of ownership is only enthralling when you return safely from your gravity defying flights of freedom.

(Published to BCGA July 16, 2020)

"Live & Learn"

Contribution by: Kenneth Armstrong
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This humourous story requires an introduction and is not meant to include safe flying tips.  In fact the story’s pilot pretty much does everything wrong and this might be a good refresher for us to consider what is necessary for a safe flight
 
It was a typical winter day in coastal British Columbia: low stratus with drizzle and enough visibility to see the radiator ornament as I drove my car to the airport. I had just soloed the day previously, and wasn't about to let a little weather deter me from another exciting aviation experience. I'll admit I was rather proud of my accomplishment, and I had invited my next door neighbor to go for a spin with me. We planned to fly to a city across the mountains where I had heard a great restaurant existed. On our way to the airport, my neighbor expressed some worry about the trip. "Don't worry about a thing," I reassured her. "Their hamburgers are apparently excellent."

By the time we found  the field the drizzle had become a heavy steady rain. This concerned me a great deal as I didn't want to get my shoes muddy. On checking with the local operator of the flying club we learned that my regular airplane, a Stinson Station Wagon was down for engine repairs again. However, the operator was a fine judge of character and when he saw my disappointment he assigned me another aircraft, C-GIFR, which turned out to be a Beechcraft Baron. "It's practically the same as the Stinson," he told me when I discovered that there was a spare engine. "Just remember that you have to retract the gear after take off."

After a quick pre-flight check (I noticed  the tail wheel was missing but didn't say anything to the operator for fear he would cancel the trip) we got aboard and began looking for the starter key. Just then he came wading out to tell me there were severe thunderstorms and turbulence at my destination and warned
me to be prudent. I assured him that, as a child, I had never been afraid of thunderstorms.

The take off was uneventful, but we did use what seemed to be a lot of runway for an airplane with two engines, even if it was downwind and I had forgotten to release the parking brakes. We climbed into a solid overcast at about 100 feet and this was a disappointing as I knew my neighbor was looking forward to seeing beautiful scenery below. The air was actually fairly smooth but ice kept building up on the Windshield making it difficult to clearly see all the clouds that surrounded us. For a pilot with only 5.6 hours of flying time I thought I was handling the plane very well, although for some reason, things kept flying out of my pockets and sticking to the roof. My neighbor, Ellen, didn't seem to notice: she just kept staring at the windshield with a sort of glassy expression. I guess the altitude or pounding rain
bothered her.

Suddenly the left engine quit. No warning, nothing. It just quit. Ellen made a gurgling noise, which was the first thing she had said since we departed. I explained that there was nothing to worry about, as we had another engine that we hadn't even used yet. Ellen must have felt better when I finally figured out how to start that second engine because she dropped right off to sleep. After about two hours it became obvious that I was going to have to descend if I was going to find the airport under the clouds between the mountains. I eventually found a road, but it was difficult to read the signs during the lightning flashes in the heavy snow. Numerous cars ran off the road when we passed them confirming that flying is a lot safer than driving. Some time later, I did find an airport but had to fly around the tower a few times to confirm it was the right one. They were very friendly in the tower and flashed numerous colored lights as a welcome. So I landed and slid up to the parking area(the operator should have mentioned that you have to put the wheels down again for landing.) Everyone there was besides themselves with excitement. It was obvious that they had never seen a Beechcraft Baron before. Ellen was still sleeping so I had to have help carrying her to the restaurant. Well I certainly must admit I learned a great deal from that trip and would like to pass on some good advice to other pilot travellers:  "Don't beleive everthing you hear - the food was terrible!"
 
----
While I have taken the liberty to modify the story the results are the same. In this adventure-land the Anti-Hero saves his bacon. However, in the real world this fellow would have been a statistic within the average of 179 seconds that a non instrumented pilot lasts in cloud. Worst still he would have taken an innocent victim with him. Perhaps I'm straying from the crux of the matter. This fictitious pilot has an attitudinal
problem.  Decades ago I attended a COPA AGM in Penticton where the guest speaker was a psychiatrist and Dr. Georgina Busch told us of the prevailing characteristics of pilot.  I was stunned.  We possess the following human characteristics:  Anti authoritarian, Stubborn, Risk takers and Opinionated and often rash with our decision making.  If some or all of these characteristics are part of your flying repertoire, you need to be much more cautious with decision making.

(Published to BCGA May 9, 2020)

"Going Feet Wet, Then and Now"

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When I started flying across The Atlantic (nicknamed The Pond) in 1973, the DC-8’s we used required a navigator who had his workstation behind the Captain’s seat and back-to-back to my Second Officer position.

These navigators were an interesting group, most had British accents and they carried beat-up “Gladstone” bags of manuals and the other tools of their trade. What was a surprise to me was that-almost as soon as we were airborne-they would pull their blackout curtain around their position, turn off their panel and worktable flood lights, put their head on the table and go to sleep. We had several hours to go to “Coast Out,” so there was actually not much for them to do as we used VOR, DME and NDB to fly the Jet Routes to the exit point of domestic airspace. Yes, the Jet Routes used NDB ground stations, Grindstone on The Magdalene Islands in the Gulf of St. Lawrence comes immediately to mind.
Uncannily, the navigators would wake up exactly on cue as we coasted out, flip on their work lights, flash up their LORAN receiver, open their almanacs and unroll large plotting charts. They would be up to speed just as the OFF flag popped up on the HSI to be followed soon after by the DME losing lock, the three drums of the distance readout spinning erratically then falling idle at some random number, not unlike a slot machine.

The navigators had a pad of “chits” which they would fill out with heading to and ETA at the next waypoint and hand up to the pilots. The DC-8 had several small, nylon clips glued to the front panels, to hold these chits as well as the takeoff and landing data and a cruise chit, all but the navigator’s chit being my responsibility.

They used a sextant too; stood on a box behind me, inserted the instrument into a port in the ceiling, moved a lever to open a shutter and the sextant would stick up into the airflow. Then they circled around like a submarine commander using a periscope, locating the desired stars or the Sun, noting the relative azimuth reading on the sextant mount as well as the elevation of the heavenly body.

Then back to their table, consult the Almanacs and fiddle with the knobs controlling the sine waves on their LORAN cathode-Ray tube display to calculate and plot the position on the big chart with rulers, dividers and slide rules, to generate another chit for navigating to the next oceanic waypoint, usually ten degrees of longitude apart.
I was shown how to tune the ADF receiver to the European coastal transmitters set up during WW2 for the U-Boats and count the beeps which gave a bearing from the station. These counts I would pass to the navigator to help him in his calculations.

The navigators never stopped working steadily for the hours we were feet wet , they had no rest at the speeds these jets crossed the meridians of longitude. Their activity level was at odds with the rest of us, whose workload rose at each waypoint and then ebbed into relaxed vigilance again.

Nearing the Coast In point, the last chit would be passed up but this time it had a VOR frequency and an OBS setting as well as an accurate estimate of what the DME would read when it locked on. It was amazing how close to centred the track bar would be, after hours over the ocean. As soon as this instrument woke up and the OFF flag dropped out of view, we would see the same activity from the navigators as we’d had when first we took off; they quickly packed up shop and took a well-deserved nap until landing.

After a few years, the first iteration of INS was retrofitted and for the navigators, the writing was on the wall. The airline offered them DC-9 First Officer positions if they gained their Restricted Senior Commercial Licence and, despite their age, some of them did and they were a pleasure to fly with.

In this earlier era, position reporting was done via High Frequency communications radio and these sets used Amplitude Modulation (AM) which could make coherent reception very “hit and miss,” depending upon many things that affect the ionospheric layer as varied as sunspot activity. The antenna had be electronically “tuned” for the desired frequency and occasionally this wouldn’t happen and then we had to resort to tuning frequencies above and then below the desired frequency, as if the tuning unit needed exercising. The continuous crashing sounds of heavy static made it difficult to break out what was being spoken and frequently some anticipation, imagination and inspired guesswork was needed to fill in the blanks. Speaking slowly and careful enunciation of “Tree, Fife, Niner”and “Tousand” helped a lot and were used by both the crews and the ground station. Several times, communication conditions were so bad that we went completely across the ocean without hearing a single word in reply, all position reports being transmitted blind.
Our oceanic clearance may have concluded with “Send Met” which meant almost doubling the content of the position report. The Oceanic Control Centre would designate certain flights to report the winds and temperatures at each reporting point and mid-way between these points too.

Whether you had the navigator’s chit or the INS data recorded on the Master Plan at waypoint passage, the Pilot Monitoring had to take a big breath before transmitting the position report as it could take more than two minutes of transmitting. We know this as some radios would either beep in our headphones or stop transmitting if they’d been keyed for two minutes, to protect against jamming the frequency with a blocked microphone.

The passing of our position report began with a specially-worded “handshake” transmission which included the frequency we were using, which allowed the FSS operator to “queue” the various flights contacting them by priority.
Typically, there’d be no reply and all we heard was the hiss of static. 

If we were lucky, we’d get a “Standby” followed by our number in the queue and if we got a “Go ahead,” it was like winning at bingo. If the next reporting point was the boundary between Oceanic Control Areas, we had to include a request to copy our report to the next agency too.

So let’s do this by picking up our old Telephonics hand mic from its in-flight resting position perfectly nestled in the operating mechanism of the sliding side window:

“Gander Gander, Air Canada Eight Fife Fower, Position on Fife Fife Fower Seven.”
“Air Canada Eight Fife Fower, Gander,  Go ahead your position.”
Take a big breath...
“Air Canada Eight Fife Fower, Position, copy Shanwick.
Fife Fife North, zero fower zero West, zero two one niner,
level tree tree zero,
estimate fife Fower north, zero tree zero West, zero tree zero seven
Fife tree North, zero two zero next
Spot wind: two seven zero diagonal six eight, minus fife two,
Fuel remaining: tree eight decimal eight
Mid, two (beep!)six fife diagonal six zero, minus fife zero,
How copy?”

Now comes the hardest part; listening through the crashing static for the readback and hoping the reception is good enough to be able to ascertain that the controller copied the important data correctly. They won’t readback all of it, instead saying “Weather copied.”

If they’ve got it on the first try, many crews confirm with a simple, “ Charlie Charlie,” meaning we confirm the correctness of their readback. Depending upon the static, it is not at all uncommon to have to correct some of the readback.

That was then. A lot has changed in the ensuing fourty-Seven years.
Upper Sideband capability greatly improved the clarity of HF communication.
SELCAL, when every individual aircraft has its own unique two-tone address, is tested at Coast Out and-if the test is successful- the controllers can set off a distinct chime in the flight deck, requesting us to contact them on HF, it works on VHF too.

If the test is not successful, then it’s going to be a long crossing and the kinder Captains will take turns with the others, maintaining a listening watch through the noise.

Also available now is SATCOM, which is as clear and reliable as VHF but expensive to use.

The next step is already expanding and it involves no talking at all, after the initial “handshake” call at Coast Out. It’s acronym is CPDLC, Controller Pilot Data Link Communication and with it all requests and reports can be passed via the alphanumeric keyboard used to access the Flight Management or Guidance Computer, the replies viewed on various screens and can even be printed out on-board.

The latest evolution is ADS-B, in which the aircraft is continuously broadcasting its FMS position, making the position report pretty-much redundant.

Recalling these old procedures resulted in my remembering a humorous exchange one morning when we established communications with “Scottish” as we coasted in:
“Air Canada Eight Five Four, radar identified, route direct Dean Cross.”
“Direct Dean’s Cross, Air Canada Eight Five Four.”

Scottish keyed his microphone, there was several moments of silence, then, with a great weariness :”Its neither plural nor possessive...SIR.”

So, the next time you press a few keys, monitor the response, turn your HF volumes all the way down and then slide your seat back, recline a bit more and put a foot up on that footrest, knowing you’ve hardly anything to do until the next waypoint and even then no transmitting, think of those who’ve gone before you, the workload and teamwork that required and now you know why those early jets required greater separation, both along track and laterally and thus rarely got their flight-planned altitude and frequently not their wished-for crossing track either.

(Published to BCGA May 1, 2020)

"An Old Airplane Mentors A Young Pilot"

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​If we learn the most from the oldest instructors, perhaps it is more than a coincidence that it takes an older airplane to give us a wake-up call about our piloting skills, in a most-violent and unforgettable way by combining a short-but-intense assault upon several of our senses simultaneously.

A moment's inattention, a distraction, a subtle relaxation of vigilance or slipping of standards to that which will not matter in a more-forgiving airplane, will give this older airplane just the chance it has been waiting for. It will smack you in the side of the head with its wood, metal or plexiglass just as effectively as a slap up the side of your head with a two-by-four will instantly and unforgettably teach you not to do that again.

While my first attempt to bank an Aeronca Champ, using the same amount of rudder that my Cub would need, resulted in the most-astonishing amount of adverse yaw I had ever seen, causing the nose to slice in the opposite direction so quickly that my big head did indeed bounce off the side window, what I wish to relate here was actually a different lesson.

When I bought my Cub, I had never flown a taildragger. The owner accompanied me around the pattern at Kingston, Ontario three times, took my certified cheque and drove away. I taxied to the pumps, filled that little tank and flew it to its new home at Brampton. Took two stops with no headwind, I don't think we overtook even a semi.

Surprisingly, nothing happened thereafter for several weeks and I began to relax, thinking either that taildraggers' reputations were overblown or- more likely at the age of twenty five-that I was a pretty-good driver despite what my instructors had predicted about my future.

However, I was soon to learn that little flying machine was just biding its time, like a crouched cat, waiting for the opportunity to teach me My Big Lesson.

It happened while landing to the North on Brampton's paved runway one Summer evening at Sunset, with just a hint of a wind from the South, not enough to require any conscious crabbing into it nor enough to stir the dozy windsock. 

The windsock wasn't the only thing dozing that evening.

We gently touched in a three-point attitude and instantly control of the airplane was snatched away from me as the Cub decided now was The Time. Three things happened simultaneously, one for each of three of my senses, which I must say adds to the experience.

My view out the front changed from a few dusky trees topped by a rosy sky to a complete blur in a flash, like facing outwards on a merry-go-round. I was thrown sideways until hitting my shoulder but my head continued until my ear smacked against something hard too. And lastly, I remember the sound, heard right through my foamy earplugs( NORDO). I didn't think those big, puffy, eight-psi tyres could squeal so loudly but one certainly was. Not only was the horizon spinning around but it was also tilting as the Cub raised her inside main wheel off the ground and it was also rising as the tail came up and the nose ( and propellor!) were going down, all in response to the unchecked centrifugal force. Had the wings not been clipped, it would surely have dragged a wingtip.

The Lesson was over in two seconds, as long as it took for the unbalanced forward force of momentum and retarding force of the main gear to align themselves one hundred and eighty degrees to what they were on landing, like the letter "Z" pulled into a straight line. Plus a few more degrees of rotation for the centrifugal force to dissipate. The Cub stopped rotating, the inner main wheel plopped back down followed soon after by the tailwheel slamming onto the ground, which slammed me back into that pathetic canvas sling that passes for a seat in Cubs.

We just sat there, still. The little Continental making happy clanking sounds at idle, the polished blades strobing the pink Sun as it touched the horizon. It had happened so quickly and caught me so unprepared that there was no time to react or get frightened, I doubt that I even had time to hold my breath. Lesson over, the Cub just sat there, on the surface appearing to be waiting for me to put it away for the night but, maybe on a deeper level, asking me, "Do you hear me? Did you get my message? I will not-cannot- tolerate being flown by such ham-fisted, fat-headed, feet-and-brains-gone-to-sleep "pilots", of which you presently are one."

After a bit, we taxied meekly to the tiedown, the Cub very obedient but perhaps just a little smug, while my legs vibrated like two tuning forks from the squirt of adrenaline that had arrived much-too late to the party. Suitably cowed, I drove home with a bruised shoulder and ego( not a bad thing, that) sporting an ear that throbbed and felt like a cauliflower. If I had a tail, I would have curled it well under my legs, too.

So: what was The Lesson? As near as I can figure, it was the Cub telling me that-if I insisted on landing it on modern pavement instead of the grass and dandelions that it preferred-then there must be absolutely no difference between where it was pointed and where it was actually going the moment that it touched down. The fact that it was soloed from the rear seat so we couldn't actually discern this now very-important bit of information just made it more sporting.

Not being a complete idiot, I invested in some quality dual with the late Frank Jenkinsen before being properly released to fly solo again.

Still, there's something funny about taildraggers. Even though My Big Lesson happened thirty-nine years ago, every now and then, without any reason or provocation, after a perfectly-acceptable, routine touchdown, they will suddenly try to charge off, maybe to attack a runway-edge light that that they have taken a dislike to or perhaps to go play in their beloved grassy infield. They've never succeeded as I learned from My Big Lesson, taught to me by an airplane and not an instructor, as now I know and am expecting it. Or maybe it's just the older airplane's way of checking that I am still deserving of it, that my skills are still up to snuff. I appreciate the surprise PPC and  am more on my toes for the experience.

I do not mean to denigrate helicopter or floatplane pilots when suggesting that I cannot think of any airplane that can so improve a pilot's skill level in such a short time as can a taildragger.

"That which doesn't kill us makes us..." How does that end again?

(Published to BCGA April 27, 2020)

“What Mighty Contests Arise From Such Trivial Things” 

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Westbound, the dark-grey waters of Davis Strait beneath, with the eye-watering brightness of the Greenland icecap now under the tail of our Lockheed L-1011 TriStar and the steep, barren Eastern side of Baffin Island sliding towards us ahead. 


I am comfortably slumped in the First Officer's seat, simultaneously enjoying the magnificent view from the largest flight deck windows ever put in an airliner, while also trying to avoid the radiant heating of the Sun, now slowly passing its zenith as it is a close race between us, this far North. We were operating Air Canada's "Western Arrow" service, Flight 855, between London's Heathrow airport and Vancouver on Canada's West Coast. Time-zone wise, we are flying one third of the way around the globe but, at these latitudes, the time zones are much narrower and therefore our entire trip takes just-over nine hours. 


We are also crossing an invisible boundary in the sky, at which traffic-coordination responsibility is handed from "Iceland Radio" to "Arctic Radio" and many of the reporting points along this border of Canadian Airspace are named after fish and other marine organisms such as OYSTR and SCROD. Canada, a huge land mass that is sparsely populated outside of a handful of cities concentrated along its Southern Border, has evolved novel ways of dealing with the necessity of air travel being the only practical way of connecting its communities and resource-extraction sites and these are a surprise to those used to more-congested airspace and continuous radar coverage. 


It is common practice to takeoff, climb, cruise, descend, approach and land, all conducted IFR and yet never once talk to a controller nor appear on a radar display; all separation between traffic assured by position reports being broadcast blind and de-conflicting being handled between the flights themselves. This is done on VHF frequencies for the lower levels but those aircraft operating at higher altitudes are coordinated by ATC, using a mix of HF and VHF, albeit still through position reports. As one of the latter, the Captain dutifully called Arctic Radio at the border. The reply, from the controller sitting well over the horizon to the South, in a repurposed nuclear-bomb shelter situated underground at North Bay, Ontario, was heavily accented in one of Canada's two official languages. 


The Captain then passed our position report which was read back by the controller who concluded with, "next report this frequency" to which the Captain replied with a rapid, double-click of his microphone button. Those trained in the military and those who were trained in the civilian world years ago will recognize this as a very efficient method of acknowledgement, which frees up valuable airtime on busy freqs and cannot be misinterpreted, and has been used for decades. To our surprise, this resulted in a tirade from Arctic Radio, including our full call sign, the amendment number to the ICAO Manual of Radiotelephony and the quote from the amended section. It went on and on, stating the double click was no longer an accepted method of acknowledgement, without the controller seemingly stopping for breath, the Captain eventually looking over at me and rolling his eyes in a hopeless/helpless gesture. 


Eventually the controller ran out steam and stopped transmitting his very-public upbraiding of our unsuitability to hold Restricted Radiotelephone Operator Certificates. The Captain did not reply. After a very-pregnant pause: "Air Canada Eight Five Five, did you copy my last transmission?" The Captain reached for his hand mic but did not pick it up and I thought, "Oh no!" and had a sudden vision of being summoned to do "The Rug Dance" in front of the Base Chief Pilot's desk. He clicked his mic button " Click-click......CLICK!" Three clicks? Hah! 


The Second Officer and myself burst into laughter, as much relieved as amused. I looked over at the Captain, apparently looking out his big windows without any expression, his face reflecting thousands of hours of squinting into the Sun, and I thought that this guy might be old but he's quick on his feet and not the least perturbed by overbearing authority or pomposity. And then I thought for a moment; here I am, sitting senior on the biggest aircraft on the base, due to migrate into the left seat of a narrow body within a few months. And I have so-much left to learn before I belong there.

(Published to BCGA April 25, 2020)

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